I normally don’t post stuff like this…
I couldn’t help it. I wanted to send out some words about this. If you’re on social media, chances are you’ve seen the #MeToo posts that are going around. I know that these hit a really sensitive note for everyone, no matter what your experience has been. I want you all to know that I honor and respect you and am proud of you for being you.
And I have so much to say about this!!!
How is this relevant? Well, first of all, how is it NOT? But that’s beside the point.
But, listen… this gets good. I kind of had an epiphany:
Sometimes you sit there and wonder, “What does this Gaby at Make Your Perfect chick actually DO?”
I inspire moms to find their fun through creativity, pleasure and flow.
Why do you need help with this? Because #MeToo.
Here’s the gist: Creativity is intricately linked with sensuality. Not in the way that you think. Not in a way that involves sex, or even a partner. Your sensuality is vital to your creativity and pleasure, and vice versa. It’s a big, crazy cycle. And it is part of what makes you YOU.
So anyway, #MeToo just made me think about how many of us still have blocks to our sensuality because of this issue. Because our culture has a really warped view of where women should be when it comes to men, when it comes to sex, when it comes to sensuality, and when it comes to pleasure. Hell, when it comes to creativity too.
And THEN, when we become mothers, this issue gets so suppressed. It gets pushed down deep inside, because—well–we have a shit ton to do. But sometimes, we get triggered. After all, we are hoping to raise children who don’t have to face the same kind of fucked up, passive-aggressive, sexual power shit that we all have dealt with all of our lives. But then what we do is push, push, push it down a little more. We have too much to do. Got a screaming kid over here. Can’t deal with this now.
So we end up CRAVING something that cannot be named. Like, ridiculously WANTING for this something to fulfill us a little more, because we are missing something in our lives that is otherwise filled with all of children, all our to-do-s, and all of the hats that we wear.
And we can’t put our finger on it:
- Do we just need to lose weight?
- Do we just need more sleep?
- Do we just need to come to terms with the fact that we don’t look 17 anymore?
- Do we just need to pick up a hobby again?
- Do we need more connection with our fellow mamas?
- Do we need more connection with our kids?
- Do we need more self-care?
- If having kids didn’t make us feel so out of control…
- If we only had more time…
- If we just weren’t living paycheck to paycheck…
- If we only had a personal chef and nanny…
- If we only had a spare second to fucking BREATHE…
Then maybe we would feel like ourselves again.
But if you don’t have full, balanced access of your creativity and your pleasure, all of those things don’t bring you fulfillment. And the CRAVING is still there. And the WANTING is still there. And then you have a mid-life crisis because who the fuck knows what to do at that point? (Kidding/not kidding).
So anyway. That just kind of got me ridiculously excited. Because I could put words to something that is holding so many mothers back from really stepping in their power, into their lives.
So the next question many of us have is, “What do we do now?”
And—geez—let’s just go one step at a time. Look at this door that was opened. Look at this conversation that was taken to another level. I wish we could change the world overnight, but it’s a journey, just like life is a journey.
And we are doing it. We are riding that journey.
So what if the next step is being more honest with OURSELVES? About what we want? About what we crave? About what is necessary to get us to that authentic place where we step into our power?
If we can step into ourselves, THEN we can work on changing the world. Stick around. You’re doing great.
P.S. Obviously, so many people are triggered by seeing how sexual harassment, assault and abuse have affected so many other people, and it may be bringing up past experiences and trauma that is difficult to deal with. If you are having trouble managing your reaction to all of this, please don’t hesitate to work with a professional psychotherapist. This has definitely stirred something up in all of us, and I am NOT a psychologist, nor do I pretend to be one on TV. But I can listen, I can inspire, and I can help you step into yourself when you’re ready.
P.P.S. If you’re being bombarded with a lot of emotions from this movement, you’re not alone. I poured my emotions into the art that’s at the top of the page. I would love for you to share what’s helping you in the comments below.