Eek. How’s that for a prospect? What if your mother and your mother-in-law ran your life? In this extremely hypothetical (and potentially horrific) example, you’ve allowed this for some reason. You’re on board. Yes, that’s right–you have agreed to let your mother and mother-in-law run your life.
What would that look like? Do they get along? Do they love each other, trust each other and communicate well? Do they both always just want what’s best for you? If that’s the case, your life would be pretty sweet, right? You might even be downright spoiled.
But what if your mother and mother-in-law hate each other? What if they’re constantly bickering, they never do what the other one says, and they really have nothing in common? That’s when your life becomes horrifying, right?
It would be HARD. You would constantly be pulled in all kinds of directions. You would never get anything accomplished, and you would never feel rewarded for the things you did get accomplished, because one of your mothers would probably be yelling about something. You’d be super emotional, and you’d probably feel like you were going kind of crazy. Sound familiar?
That’s what happens when you haven’t built a strong, communicative, trusting relationship between your conscious and your subconscious.
See, what happens is that your life is run by two sides of your being:
- Your subconscious – call this your higher self, your intuition, your innermost desires. This runs in the background. You don’t really notice it, but it’s at work all the time.
- Your conscious mind – this is your “monkey brain.” It’s the part that works hard to help you take action, set habits and follow through. It’s also the part that can really get in the way of what your subconscious really wants.
Your subconscious and your conscious mind have a relationship. And to have a smooth relationship, you need trust and communication. It’s like any relationship. You know how when you have a really great relationship with someone, you don’t even have to talk? You kind of do what the other person wants automatically. Everything flows, everything seems easy. It’s like you can read each other’s minds.
That’s the kind of relationship you want between your conscious and your subconscious.
So let’s go back to that odd situation where your mother and your mother-in-law hypothetically run your life. If they don’t trust each other and communicate, they’re constantly at odds, and one of them will say, “I really want this for my darling daughter’s life.” But the other one will say, “Well, I don’t want that. Fuck off. I’m going to do something totally different.”
And so what happens? They eventually stop listening to each other, acknowledging each other or giving each other the time of day. They definitely don’t trust each other, so if one of them says something to the other, the other might intentionally go against it just to piss her off. And how would your life feel? Really hard. It would be a lot of work trying to get everyone to get along.
If your mother and mother-in-law do trust each other and communicate well, there’s barely any work involved. One of them says, “I want this for my darling daughter.” The other one says, “Sweet, so do I. Let’s make it happen for her.” And that’s what they do—they create the life that you want.
Your life is created by your desires. Those desires mainly come from your subconscious.
So if you’re living your life in tune with your subconscious desires, your conscious and your subconscious keep trusting each other. They keep jiving. They keep holding hands and dancing and making things happen for you. And eventually, they do all the work, and you just ride along. And that’s when you’re in the flow.