After 2, or 22, or 72 months of changing diapers, getting vomited and shit on, cosleeping, crying it out, making cooing noises, poring over Pinterest, poring over parenting books, gentle disciplining, spanking, not spanking, spoon feeding, babyled weaning, preschooling, homeschooling, playgrouping, mommy meetuping, exercising, lounging, stay-at-homing, working, birth controlling, natural family planning, scheduling, driving, teaching, loving…being a mom can make you feel like “Wait—what am I actually doing in this life anymore?”

Because after all that, what part of you is left for hobbies or interests, not to mention—passion?

As a fresh-faced teen, with nothing but a looming algebra quiz to taint our blissful days, the notion of finding our passion was inspiring, hopeful, magnificent. It conjured up fantasies of adventure, muses, brilliance, innovation, and determination. And it was attainable in our wide-eyed naïveté.

As a mom who can barely find time to brush her hair, much less find her passion, the notion of finding your passion seems—at the very least—laughable, and—at the most—a pipe dream.

You may have grown from a wide-eyed innocent into an exhausted nurturer, but you’re not completely jaded. The real you is still locked in there, and she knocks every once in a while, begging for the chance to come out. And she falls somewhere in between the girl who believed in fairy tales and the woman who barely believes in herself anymore.

And that’s just it—now that you’re older and wiser, you are sage to the notion of balance. You understand that the world isn’t made of all or nothing.

So why are you still clinging to the paradigm of passion vs. cynicism?

Passion in Everything

Passion isn’t an ideal floating in a balloon far out of reach; it can be found in every single thing you do on a daily basis. And if you start to let the passion into your life slowly, bit by bit, from the ground up, you cultivate your passion from within you. And then your fruitless journey to find an inaccessible ideal becomes a fruitful existence filled with meaning.

Great, you say. But between the nurturing, decision-making, and the schlepping, where do you start?

A Journey To Passion

I have been following Amber Leitz, a sensual embodiment coach who is all about mindfulness surrounding the physical experience of sensuality. I started following her because I needed more sensuality in my life. Although I have always been a pretty warm and physical person, since I’ve had kids I shy away from people giving me hugs and kisses; if my husband reaches over and strokes my arm in bed, I freeze. So I decided it was time to explore the whole experience of really enjoying everything about my physical body and the physical space around me.

My life changed after I listened to Amber talking about sensuality during one of her free telecalls one night. If you asked me, I honestly couldn’t tell you one specific thing she said. But as she spoke, I started to get uncomfortable at my kitchen table, under the bright lights. Halfway through the call, I had to move to the coziness of my bedroom.

As soon as the call was over, I instantly couldn’t stand the piles of clothes all over the floor or the junk accumulating on my dresser. I needed the room to be devoid of clutter but full of energy. I broke out my old salt lamp; I lit a candle. All of a sudden, I actually wanted to be with myself in this space.

Am I passionate about cleaning? No. Am I particularly passionate about living a clutter free life? No. That’s just not my thing. But all of a sudden, I am loving every experience I have when I’m in my bedroom. {And trust me, it’s not what you’re thinking.} In fact, seemingly routine activities, like reading before bed, which I used to do on the couch in the living room while my husband watched TV, are now made delicious, cozy, and—dare I say—passionate because I’m experiencing them instead of just going through the motions.

I’m in a space that feels juicy, passionate, energetic and soothing, and that transcends to everything I do.

If you had asked me before I met Amber, I would have told you that if there was anything I needed in my life right now, it was a little privacy. I thought I needed a quiet, cozy space to experience my thoughts in. It wasn’t until I connected with Amber, listened to her telecall, and then transformed my space that I realized what I actually needed was a sacred, delicious space to experience myself in.

And since that moment, I have been connecting with the beautiful and the enchanting in my life. And my life feels beautiful and enchanted.

Break Free from the Norm

So if you’re having trouble finding your passion, where can you start? Well, that’s just it. Just start. You don’t have to start huge. You don’t have to determine what your passion is before you go with it. It will go with you if you feel passionate about what you’re doing on a daily basis.

What can you do to find more passion in your seemingly mundane routine? Or, better yet, how can you sprinkle your seemingly mundane routine with bits of passion?

The answer is different for everyone; what resonates with me might not resonate with you. But if you’d like some starting points, stay tuned for Part 2 of this article later in the week.

If you have an inkling that getting better connected with your body will help cultivate your passionate soul, check out Amber at Sacredglow.com or click here to follow her on Facebook.

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